Will marriage resolve my pornography addiction?

Is marriage compatible with pornography addiction?

Have you ever asked yourself this question? 

You have a girlfriend (boyfriend) and it’s getting serious; you’ve decided you’re going to marry them, both of you have said “yes”! It’s planned to take place this year. In the picture you’re painting, all is well, the colours are well-chosen, the characters are in the right place, but there’s a problem with the shadowy areas.

First of all, there is a question you must ask yourself: Do you really want to break this addiction or do you think this is more a way of creating of a loophole?

In fact, underneath it all, you might say to yourself pornography will be helpful for your relationship. In times of boredom or fatigue, you can look at pictures to pass the time, find pleasure, introduce fantasy or break the routine of the sexual life of your couple.

However, I really don’t think this is going to help you. Pornography addiction is questionable as a wedding present. And above anything else, it’s not likely to improve your addiction but will introduce new hesitations and doubts into the heart of your relationship.

You and your ‘plus 1’ will surely bring different personal histories to your relationship, which play a role in the rapport with your sexuality. Pornography presents us with a vision of sexuality that makes use of the other’s body for our own pleasure first, with their pleasure secondary.

What are the dangers associated with this addiction?

You’ve seen an enormous number of images or behaviours, when watching films or looking at pictures. Pornography has changed your relationship with reality, by making you journey through a universe of illusions. Naturally, this brings you to think about reproducing the gestures you’ve seen, but they don’t in fact correspond with the situations within your marriage. These acts, carried out under the influence of the images you’ve seen, won’t be inspired by your desire to delight the other.

In marriage, there’s a whole other relationship at play. It’s the total gift to give. Love, fidelity and honesty are expressed in the language of the body.

The point of marital union isn’t firstly pleasure, but rather an intimate union with the other.

The best wedding present you can give to your plus 1 and yourself, is to get help. This addiction is serious, and trying to break out of it by yourself is too complex.

So at this question, “Will marriage resolve my pornography addiction?”, the answer is no.

How do you do it?

You’ll need to be accompanied by a specialist or ask for help. However, be very careful not to treat your partner as a therapist.

We can help you, and suggest you entrust this important step to Carlo Acutis. Don’t hesitate to talk to us via the chat (free and anonymous).

Going further:

• Help! My husband recently disclosed his porn addiction to me.
• My husband watches porn: is it my fault?
• What’s wrong with masturbation ?